Totally why i dont have a girlfriend

Do you think the person you're breaking up with might cry? Lose his or her temper? How will you deal with that kind of reaction? Have good intentions. Let the other person know he or she matters to you. Think about the qualities you want to show toward the other person — like honesty, kindness, sensitivity, respect, and caring. Be honest — but not brutal. Tell the other person the things that attracted you in the first place, and what you like about him or her. Then say why you want to move on.

Think of ways to be kind and gentle while still being honest. Say it in person. You've shared a lot with each other. Respect that and show your good qualities by breaking up in person. If you live far away, try to video chat or at least make a phone call. Breaking up through texting or Facebook may seem easy.

But think about how you'd feel if your BF or GF did that to you — and what your friends would say about that person's character! If it helps, confide in someone you trust. It can help to talk through your feelings with a trusted friend. But be sure the person you confide in can keep it private until you have your actual break-up conversation with your BF or GF.

That's one reason why parents, older sisters or brothers, and other adults can be great to talk to. They're not going to blab or let it slip out accidentally. DON'T: Don't avoid the other person or the conversation you need to have. Dragging things out makes it harder in the long run — for you and your BF or GF. Plus, when people put things off, information can leak out anyway.

You never want the person you're breaking up with to hear it from someone else before hearing it from you. Don't rush into a difficult conversation without thinking it through. You may say things you regret. Don't disrespect. Speak about your ex or soon-to-be ex with respect. That meant things evolved very slowly certainly be modern standards but my gaucheness was more acceptable.

I would never do any of these things either. I do find it probably the hardest thing at the moment, its harder than getting a job. The point Ill make theres only so much you can do from your side, the rest is up to the girl to determine.

If shes no interested shes not interested. In my experiences with dating, things usually are good to start with than it tethers off usually between 1 to 4 dates. I can usually tell if somethings gone sour, you feel the slipp eg not talking to you any more, saying lifes and work ect is busy. The harsher side to this is girls that have completely cut you off with no explanation, or they block you, its bizzare but happens a lot and is very common.

I do think it has to be a 2 way street, not all the criticism should come to me, some but not all. I do feel like its to bias out there with opinions always centred around girls being in the right and the guy that needs to change to afford her. I have instead undertaken a attitude of finding some one who understands my side aswell not just giving advice but understanding the reasons why.

Its going to have to be someone really open minded and compasionate but itll be much worth it. Itll be a lot better than just accepting constant advice that your in the wrong all the time and its you that needs to change, not some things that women do on there part, such as canceling dates on the last minute, standing you up, blocking you for no reason, leading you on then moving onto another guy.

Some things are not my making or to do with me, but its much worth it, finding someone who understands and agrees with you, rather than conform to some dating rules and playing it safe. Any how thats what I have developed recently, I would rather go by my life experience, not advice.

This is totally me ….. I made all those mistakes more than once……….. And I hav really lost confidence already and I bliv I will never get it back…… Anyho this was very nice. Quite a Change in the women of today compared to Most of the Good old fashioned women that were the Best at one time which made it very Easy for the men in those days since they really had No Problem at all finding Real Love the way our family members had it. This is totaly me, i made this mistakes too often and seriusly have lost confidence over girls but since hve read this i think am gonna follow them…Thanks alot.

I like this advice. Wish I had it years ago. I quit trying to date 15 yrs. Dating was the most annoying and aggravating experience of my entire life. All I got if I got anything was losers, misfits, and freeloaders. Best dating pool is , after that it really sux fast. I started dating too late in life—age 35, and by then most good prospects were long gone. Women today are selective, demanding, and entitled—you must work hard to land a quality partner.

Be sure you are willing to do the work or plan on being a bachelor for life. Check out Tom Leykis on YouTube for dating tips—he is great. Finally realize—none of us is owed a relationship, lover, or even a date. Good luck—hope your story ends better than mine.

Read the books—Save the Males and Men on Strike—well done and gives you insight into our dating world. Your email address will not be published. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment.

Never Had a Girlfriend? So ask yourself. What have you actually done to try and meet the girl of your dreams? Have you downloaded Tinder and created a profile? Have you signed up to online dating sites like Match. Have you been going out regularly or attended social events where you meet lots of new people? We would have been about 17 and our interest in boys was just awakening.

Those were the days when lads would come up to your table and ask to buy you a drink and generally things would start off well enough, with everyone chatting, but then, as the evening progressed, I would slowly be rubbed out until I felt I had become totally invisible.

When I went to university, I fully expected my life as an adult to begin. But nothing happened. Just recently, my best friend — someone I have known since junior school — said to me that she wishes she had given me a good shake when we were at university. She was studying in the next city and would visit me for hall parties and other socials, and now says she could see what I was doing wrong. She says I made it such hard work for any boy who approached me, that I was too much of challenge.

I half know what she means, although it had nothing to do with playing hard to get. I think, at the root of it, was my lack of self-belief. I so doubted myself, and that anyone would fancy me that I wanted anyone who showed an interest to prove that he liked me, to stick around long enough to persuade me.

They never did — they just moved on to the next person. The first was when I was at university — three interminable years of watching from the sidelines as my friends fell in and out of love, and worse, hearing them make out noisily in our shared house, where the huge Victorian rooms had been divided into two by plywood partitions.

The second was in my late 20s and early 30s, when I was changing jobs regularly and having to go through the same getting-to-know you scenario, which, of course, involved being asked about my love life. But it's also the way he looks at me, and is completely at ease around me I know a lot of you will think, "Why does she continue to hang out with him if she's obviously unable to have him?

Well, the hurt just comes from my desire being unrequited and of course worrying about "what if" he decided to begin something with me only if it were after leaving his girlfriend, in what my deepest of hopes would be a mutual decision between him and her where there is as little hurt as possible and worrying if he would just do the very same thing with another girl I want what is best for everyone but I don't want to lose him as a friend.

Just having him near is good enough, knowing that he cares about me in SOME healthy way. That is the extent of it.

I know I'm continuing to get my hopes up, but I also know the reality of it. I know he may not even be infatuated with me, and that I might just be reading too much into it. I know I may be in love with the "idea" of him, though I personally feel that isn't so Click to choose posts category Show expert posts Show community posts.

Ask the community. What are your thoughts? Any similar stories? There must be. Personal struggles. Hi guys. I'm new here Lately, I've been stressed by a new addition in my boyfriend's life: his female friend from work. He and I are in our 20s and have been together for two years. We've had a solid and happy relationship until this point And I feel that my boyfriend should be more alert to the red flags that I'm seeing from her.

Henceforth I will call this girl "Lacey" and I'll call my boyfriend "Joe. He's nonjudgmental a little too much, in my opinion He's extremely loyal and respectful towards women. He's a clear and honest communicator. My happiness is one of his greatest priorities, but he won't compromise his values or beliefs to please me. He gets sad about the fact that he has very few friends.

He doesn't want to lose Lacey's friendship. Here's the facts about me: I'm pretty smart and diplomatic. I'm a pretty good judge of character and strongly dislike unethical people. I'm not a jealous person and know that I can't change someone or dictate how to live their life.

If there is a conflict, I always scrutinize my feelings and perspective before the other person's. Here's the facts on Lacey: She's in her mid-twenties and is single. She comes across as attractive and normal She got pregnant as a teenager and has two kids by two men. She was married to Dad 2 until he cheated. Then she started cheating WITH him on his currently-pregnant girlfriend.

She felt zero guilt about this. Now Dad 1 has temporarily moved into her apartment with his new girlfriend. Lacey is now cheating with him instead. Again, she feels no guilt for doing this. Besides those scary facts, this is my biggest problem with her: She seems clueless about proper behavior when being friends with a man in a relationship.

Here are some examples: - When Joe and I first started hanging out with her, we'd go out every weekend. Then I started realizing she had no interest in being friends with me. Also, she would only text him, not me. I found it very rude and started not wanting to hang out with her. I got tired at midnight and went to bed. Instead of leaving soon after which seems proper to me , she stayed and talked with Joe until after am.

Once, they were out for about 6 hours. I ended up going to bed by myself. My boyfriend insisted that it was fine and normal. I feel it wasn't right.

I didn't like the vibe I got from that. He said I was uglyyyy," she said while laughing. I just sat there like, Really?

You think I wanna hear about what you two banter about? Joe insists that he knows what flirtation is, and doesn't flirt with her. Now she has a lunch shift that coincides with Joe's. They've gotten lunch together a few times now. And she has posted two Instagram photos of them at lunch together. She likes referring to him as her BFF "best friend forever". In the second photo, she was pressed against his side with her hand wrapped around his upper arm. It was a pose that could be construed as either innocent or a bit too cozy.

So that's it in a nutshell. I keep trying to avoid blaming Joe for condoning and going along with her questionable behavior especially those dinners they used to get. He also thinks I'm judging her too harshly and reading too far into her behavior.

And I think he's egging her on by condoning questionable behavior: letting her take pictures of them together, buying her a funny shirt, texting her regularly, etc.

I just don't know how to feel about this, guys. I hope you can tell me your thoughts about this. I know that asking him to end their friendship is out of the question.

That's not my job as his girlfriend. But am I crazy for thinking she's behaving inappropriately? Or is he behaving inappropriately too? Am I crazy for thinking he shouldn't be hanging around with a woman who cheats shamelessly? Am I crazy for thinking that spending evenings alone with her is inappropriate from now on, now that they have the opportunity to get lunch together? I would really appreciate any advice or thoughts you guys have on my situation. It's so hard feeling so alone. Ask the community trust, someone else, flirting.

I am so in love. I love him with all of my heart. He is perfect. He makes me feel perfect and special. He always knows how to make me feel better. But we are getting older now, and I just feel like I sometimes am in a different stage in my life. I sometimes feel more mature. He is going to be the same. He is going to still be this amazing and wonderful person but he has no head on his shoulders. He has a dream but is afraid to go for it. Or at least that's what it seems like.

Which is why I feel like I am constantly searching for something new. I am heavily attracted to one of our close friends and I keep having these dreams of being with him and I feel so guilty. And sometimes I catch myself flirting with him, laying down and snuggling with him and constantly thinking about him. The way I used to think of my boyfriend. But the thing is i feel like I will never stop loving my boyfriend. I love him so incredibly much so I feel so guilty.

Am I guilty of cheating in my head? Am I cheating because I flirt with my guy friend? Am I wrong for having these sorts of dreams? I have spoken to my boyfriend about my feelings and he does know about them.

Ask the community someone else, flirting. I met him about four years ago. We got along right away and became friends. He said he liked my friend but I kind of thought he liked me. After a while I told my best friend I liked him and she told me I should tell him so I did after I thought about it. It was so simple. Not complicated. It was too easy, I wasn't worried about girls liking him or him talking to other girls. It just worked. It freaked me out and I also wasn't ready for a relationship at the time.

So I broke up with him. He was hurt. Really hurt. We continued to be friends and my friend started dating him with my permission. I wanted to say I felt the same but I couldn't hurt my friend so I just talked him through it. We continued to be friends. Some things happened that didn't have to do with him that caused us to be distant. We didn't talk for almost a year and he broke up with my friend and after a bit he started dating another girl.

He didn't want to talk to me. I asked him why and he kept switching his reasons. I missed him. A month ago he texted me only saying "hey". I deleted his contact to help me get over him so I replied "who's this" he said a week later "this is" I replied "K? He said it wasn't my fault and that it was his.

We were okay. We have been talking lots more. Last week we both went to a fire, he brought his girlfriend and he hugged me. He gave me these looks. And talked to his friend whiling looking at me. After he left I texted him and said "hey there", he replied "hey A!! It was nice to see you, how's the party going" we talked for a bit and then he said he had to go to bed an he would text me tomorrow.

He sent me a good morning text. It was so nice to wake up to. He was flirting with me, he even sent a heart and corrected it to be a laugh face. I want to tell him but it'll hurt his girlfriend and what if he doesn't feel the same? I think I should tell one of my friends that's good friends with him.

Maybe he would know. What do you guys think? I have been married for over 10 years and together for around 18 years. We also have two children together. I have always been faithful and never strayed and nor has my partner. Over the past couple of years our sex life has gone downhill somewhat to the point it is now it probably once every two to three months and when we do it, its nothing special.

I am finding myself spending less and less together and most days go by without even such a kiss or I love you anymore. We don't argue much and do generally get along pretty well together.